Because if they really heard you, like really let it in, they would have to do something. They would have to look at what they didn’t do or what they allowed or what they avoided. They would have to change and change is terrifying to people who have spent their lives learning how to numb, deflect, and survive by playing hot potato with discomfort.

So when someone comes to them with truth that makes them uncomfortable, they shut down, they say you’re overreacting or it’s not that bad because to admit you’re right would mean admitting they failed to take action. They can’t live with that so they leave us holding the pain they should have helped carry.