how could i

How could I go on
When I have already seen the end
Where love is never enough
And staying is just pretend
How could I get by
When pain is all that stays
Where hope is another knife
That twists itself every day
How could I have peace
When peace is never free
Where it gets traded
For a life that doesn’t see

i have always lived in the dark
and i have always lived in the light
and i have seen and held the things
that i have been told don’t matter
i have seen the colors and the pain
i have seen the reflection beyond the rain
i have felt love in short bursts
i have felt beauty inside the hurts
and i circle back to where it all starts
and i come here with my full heart
and i don’t know if more can be done
i don’t know if any of it was ever love